The Queen Of Hearts

Friday, December 11, 2009

10:26 PM ; is are was were

realised tt i have been crying everyday

sad to know tt how my life has reached a phase as such. again...

wad a liminal state - a feeling new yet was strangely familiar..

I m just sorry we all met & become friends. I am sorry tt we made promises to each other n know tt right now we r nothing close to those promises. i remember the poems u spoke about. the gifts. the letters. the sms-es u gave... u did not keep ur word. no effort to do so. n i kind of hate u for being the reason for my tears every night.

i hope u will find out how i feel so tt u will realised wad you have done ...

but i m not gg to bother tellin u about it... or even being angry with u... they are right... if you will not bother... why should i...

i grew up. i see the world, i met the strangers. now i have a piece of breaking frienship, reminding me to grow out of my chidish dreams n convenient tagline of "friend forever"

no such thing one... the world's just lying to everyone. all the children about this "friend forever" thing... they make us all believe and then make us KNOW tt it is not true at the end of the day.

Goodluck to all u who have no idea whats coming your way.

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

5:33 PM ; Backed to Singapore...

hello...
I am backed to Singapore with many reflections and upsetting emotions to deal with

while trip to Malacca was a lot of fun. laughter screaming n all.. very wild and crazy... i was backed with a heavy heart.. thinking about many issues.. of which some i supposed was unnecessary, but some extremely vital.

i believe tt ppl change... relationship change... quality of relationship change. closeness change. but i refuse to believe in some1 whom i once believed as my best friend would probably wouldnt be anymore. i recalled the down and stormy times we once passed thru few yrs backed. never did i imagine tt things could end up till the state it was

i know and i understand tt one will be in a form of circumstances tt will not allow blatant publicity. i know what do secrets mean and i have no intention of exploring them shamelessly. its just perhaps a issue i have to wrestle with myself to accept the fact

hoping tt 1 day i will gladly dismisssed the thought of you as my best man and the thought of you as my best friend..

i dun need to feel all. perhaps all i need to do was to stay away ..

hope tt will help.

i woke up with my mum's scolding today. quite ridiculous.. random n without reasons as usual. but i m glad i did not woke up depressed of losing a best fren.

hope i 'll win ..