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Monday, March 27, 2006

12:34 AM ;



read the blog..


i realised how i can break hearts of ppl unknowingly...


i dint noe how serious u r with me, i dun if u even noe it might just b a crush, but i dun mean to hurt u like this..



all the things i've done, like shit... i really dunno tt i m hurting some1...



hey i m sorry.. like sat says, dun like u like tt way u think, but i'll definitely LOVE u as a fren.. i promise.... i m real....


sometimes i just hate myself for being sucha heartbreaker.. the worst thing is i dun even noe it....



fffreak..



2ml ggettin back results.. i duno how dead can i be



jesus, bless me





Saturday, March 25, 2006

10:35 PM ;



i think this weekend is the most weeekend-looking weekend ever


do u know how happy i m feeling nw!! its nt even the end of the week, n i've alr concluded tt this is gonna b my most exciting n happenin weekend.. oooh lala..



fri ... finish the damn paper... went eat with 'family'.. home to rest, go stan's hse...steamboat at turf city.. den some of us gt driven ard.... to mt faber + west coast moments was the best lah.... it was a cool chill after all.. alirght.. chiilllin.... frrreakin chilllly... only they know wad i meant lah huh..



sat!!!!!!!!!!


sentosa...
1stly, was quite disapppointed... cos mon chi chi aka father figure aka sathiya wasnt there.. all of us, really ALL of us sooooo disappointed.... we actually took turns to call him, all they way till we go off, still he dint pick up the call. but we know lah.. he really v tired, so dint make a big shit out of it...
reason we wanted him to go:
a) he represents 10 persons physically
b) he represents 10 persons in terms of VOICE, to be specific, noisy-nesss
c) this is the 1st freakin 'family' outting ever n EVERYBODY, including BRA(hu innitially cant come, n dun wan to come) + princess prissy (who sacrifice her slp time to help out her mommy so tt she can join us)... n the most loved mon chi chi wasnt there....


YOU OUGHT TO FEEL BAD... u dint even give us a call to tell us something...


BUT WE LOVE U ANY OH HOW!


but despite tt, all of us have lots of funnnnnnn


*played 21, vip the banker owes us some CENTS



*played [OLD MAID]... stanley , prissy + me, hur hur.. lost a few rounds.. n have to do some 2pid forfeit lah... but i tot pris+stan's forfeit was the most...*tsk *tsk ones lah...



*volleyball.... the 5 of us have soooo much fun wif volley in the water n on the land.. pris came up with the liminality theory, vip with his enthusiastic expression towards vollyball as he treats some of the game so seriously tt he displayed some super duper disgusting lip movements.. stanley n his animalistic characteristic tt he..... ___________ constantly, ok.. i shall not say wad is it.. brabra, realises her significance is the grp cos she claims every1 have no pt being there cos she saved MOST of the balls n we... LOST some.. n me.. the most perfect, humble, sophisticated player of dem all, decently n professionally played the game... *ahem* like.. rrrighttt..


most imptly, we achieved our family goal of hitting 10 balls w/o dropppin on the floor like after 100 tries? we r damn good rit.. so i suggest takin part in a competition... right....





we all had our fill of fun.. den fill of food..



yeo's email: After this weekend, the party is over - let's keep the motor going ..




smses coming in ...
-peijun, had a crazy weekend?
-hows a weekend after WEEKS of studyin..

i tell u.. its super duper shiok...
tell u again, its endin soon





Friday, March 24, 2006

12:59 PM ;



fri.. 9.40... last CA paper...

alrits...

i m so damn happy! finished ca finally... yea.. this is not a lvls... not prelims, nt mid yr, duno y i still so happy though..

perhaps i desperately needed some rest... v v v short rest..... frm all the late nights, cant-slp nites, muggin, whew.. whatever.. its so over....


to hell with the results.. i've done my best

i just love my frensss so much.. to be specific, my family...
huisky whisky wasabi waikiki pocky n father mon chi chi
oh my goodness.. they simpy blow me away...
they r the best frens in the world...


a grp tt goes against all odds to make u smile,
a grp tt doesnt keep secrets to themselves,
a grp tt knows damn welll when 1 is sad n 1 is glad,
a grp tt stood by each other, encourage each other thru difficult times,
a grp tt calls u to keep u awake while u r abt to fall aslp while studyin,
a grp tt goes all out to give advice,
to care
to share
to love...

u wldnt know how much i love all of u..

thanks.. n sorry for the wrong things i have done...

really.... i mean it. i love u..

we'll gothic together
we'll wasabi together
we'll wan xi shao together
we'll nah nah together..

tis - our lingo..
no1 canbreak the love btwn us...

sathystanleyvippydebbyprissy

like how vip puts, : we shall all remain frens till we grow old n die..

2 blacks, 1 ah pei--- 3 cucumbers
1 blur, 1 short, 1 fat --- 3 coliflowers (cauliflowers)





Thursday, March 16, 2006

9:54 AM ;



thu... 4 more days to exam day...
read mr yeo's email.. stop n think, what have u done for the past 3 days..

i m nt guilty of any charges, i know myself tt i have done quite a lot of studying..
but still, still gt so much nt done, readings nt read, lecture nt understood, stuffs nt memorised..

to u, who might or might not read this, i m sorry...
sorry tt i cant acc u to the party.. i know how much u wanted to go.. if there's any reason tt i will go, 1st is the bdae gal, 2nd is u..

for the past few days i've been thinking a lot to myself... wads the opportunity cost of gg. it will really be too much..

thu, start preparing, time wasted... go out... come back on fri.. tired.. slp, time wasted... next day, energy-less.. how to study.. fri nite.. oh wait, evening, church sem, whole day on sat, church sem, sun... church...

as pris says, we r nt smarty panties.. if we let ourselves off for a while, we r screwed.. really screwed...

aniways, i m really v sorry for nt acc-ing u 2dae... i noe its hard to understand this situation, but taking into account again tt i dun wanna b restless to b in church on fri, i really cant go.. if i cant compromise my faith bcos of studies, i have to sacrifice my enjoyment time, my slp time etc..

u noe its hard to make this decision, esp when it concerns 2 of ur best frens. i dunno how many sorrys i can say, i dunno how to say to make u understand... really, i just cant afford to regret having fun at the expense of my studies...

i love u both , u noe i do...

good luck..





Monday, March 13, 2006

6:42 PM ;



2dae is 1 nah nah day... whatever tt means *shrugs shoulders*



went sch for Lit Lecture this morning...

n yes... at the end of the lesson, i went up to Mr Sas

during tutorial last wk, he gave back our test papers to us, i gt 5 over 25.. he mentioned almost every 1 is the class, Oh wait, i think is every 1 in the cls, regarding what n where their probs is, how to improve, or even praises some .... EVERYONE... except me...




i admit i was really disappointed.. i mean .. it kind of sends me a msg tt i m kind-of hopeless....

like yea.. every1 gets commented but nt u... if its nt alr hopeless den y so?

i dunno if i m right but..

Mr Sas replied: u noe, wen i alr lost hope, its wen i dun say anything..

almost immediately , i feel tears in my eyes..




i hate being such a WOOSY.... tears for every little thing tt is said or happened...

he said it jokingly mind u, yet i just felt tt pinch in my heart, inside me, the voice, "i think u r really hopeless"

i replied Mr Sas,"yes, i gave up hope on myself too"




i noe i noe, i m just but a silly gurl it seeems, obviously, (mayb) he's joking... n obviously, i m nt supposed to give up, n MOST obviously, that voice inside me, its nt from me or God, y do i believe it anyway?

how to improve? i often doubt myself at being able to do so... how to score A? i mean okay, B???


my auntie just promised me, she'll bring me on a hols if i get at least 3 Bs...

can or not?

A level's IS NOT something i want to pass, its something i MUST EXCEL...

there's too much voices inside me, i m so confused


PeiJun, SHUT UP and just get on with it...

n i mean really, SHUT UP





Thursday, March 09, 2006

8:27 PM ;



i duno if i can blog on wad i actually gone thru 2dae..

1 word.. traumatized...

i actually, i actually, i actually.. saw... a guy... dropping bombs in sch 2dae..


bcos bcos bcos..


he dint lock da freakin toilet door


ARGHS!!!!!!!


like.. WTH...
its sooooo embarrassing... SHUCks... i cant believe y such weird things always happen 2 me..

goodness gracious me.. its gonna b 1 hell awkward situation wen i c him man....
like .... GOODNESS!

but sum1 reminded me... tt he's gonna b 10x more embarrassed den i m lah..

ok.. i m sorry k! so guys.. pLS freakking remember tt ur door is REALLy lock b4 u do ur business can....!!! HAIYA!


had my 1st CA paper... GP...
like debra wisely puts, paper was like pang sai.. n i m serious...
i cant fail man....

after tt gt econs tutoria, b4 ms kat comes, we (the cauliflowers) played some bombing game.... ok.. both in the toilet n in the classroom..
n guess wad... we played catching... n block catching...
as well as the punching game, the pinching game etc..
i bet the whole class thinks we r crazy.. ok.. childish..
but who cares.. we had our fill of fun n laughter...
cauliflowers go go go!
blackies ah pei.. go go go!

i love u all... i really do..

looking forward for breakfast with 'family' 2ml..

yah.. like thanks lah.. whoever make it damn early can...eeer...

THANKS...





Monday, March 06, 2006

9:41 PM ;



Her hair was up in a pony tail,
her favorite dress tied with a bow.
Today was Daddy's Day at school,
and she couldn't wait to go.

But her mommy tried to tell her,
that she probably should stay home.
Why the kids might not understand,
if she went to school alone.

But she was not afraid,
she knew just what to say.
What to tell her classmates,
of why he wasn't there today.

But still her mother worried,
for her to face this day alone.
And that was why once again,
she tried to keep her daughter home.

But the little girl went to school
eager to tell them all.
About a dad she never sees
a dad who never calls.

There were daddies along the wall in back,
for everyone to meet.
Children squirming impatiently,
anxious in their seats.

One by one the teacher called
a student from the class.
To introduce their daddy,
as seconds slowly passed.

At last the teacher called her name,
every child turned to stare.
Each of them was searching,
a man who wasn't there.

"Where's her daddy at?"
she heard a boy call out.
"She probably doesn't have one,"
another student dared to shout..

And from somewhere near the back,
she heard a daddy say,
"Looks like another deadbeat dad,
too busy to waste his day."

The words did not offend her,
as she smiled up at her Mom.
And looked back at her teacher,
who told her to go on.

And with hands behind her back,
slowly she began to speak.
And out from the mouth of a child,
came words incredibly unique.

"My Daddy couldn't be here,
because he lives so far away.
But I know he wishes he could be,
since this is such a special day.

And though you cannot meet him,
I wanted you to know.
All about my daddy,
and how much he loves me so.

He loved to tell me stories
he taught me to ride my bike.
He surprised me with pink roses,
and taught me to fly a kite.

We used to share fudge sundaes,
and ice cream in a cone.
And though you cannot see him.
I'm not standing here alone.

"Cause my daddy's always with me,
even though we are apart
I know because he told me,
he'll forever be in my heart"

With that, her little hand reached up,
and lay across her chest.
Feeling her own heartbeat,
beneath her favorite dress.

And from somewhere here in the crowd of dads,
her mother stood in tears.
Proudly watching her daughter,
who was wise beyond her years.

For she stood up for the love
of a man not in her life.
Doing what was best for her,
doing what was right.

And when she dropped her hand back down,
staring straight into the crowd.
She finished with a voice so soft,
but its message clear and loud.

"I love my daddy very much,
he's my shining star.
And if he could, he'd be here,
but heaven's just too far.

You see he was a policeman
and died just this past year.
When airplanes hit the towers
and taught Americans to fear.

But sometimes when I close my eyes,
it's like he never went away."
And then she closed her eyes,
and saw him there that day.

And to her mother's amazement,
she witnessed with surprise.
A room full of daddies and children,
all starting to close their eyes.

Who knows what they saw before them,
who knows what they felt inside.
Perhaps for merely a second,
they saw him at her side.

"I know you're with me Daddy,"
to the silence she called out.
And what happened next made believers,
of those once filled with doubt.

Not one in that room could explain it,
for each of their eyes had been closed.
But there on the desk beside her,
was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.

And a child was blessed, if only for a moment,
by the love of her shining star.
And given the gift of believing,
that heaven is never too far.








La reine des coeurs

Affection

pee eee aii jay euu ann
19th April
21
pearln87@hotmail.com

just dancing that dance for you


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